Children who were abused grow into teens and adults that feel flawed, inferior, worthless, hopeless, inadequate, dirty, overwhelmed with deep shame, depressed, anxious, extreme loneliness, helpless and afraid.

Children who were abused grow into teens and adults that feel flawed, inferior, worthless, hopeless, inadequate, dirty, overwhelmed with deep shame, depressed, anxious, extreme loneliness, helpless and afraid. They have low self-esteem and self-worth, aggression or anger control issues, feel like a failure, are severely lacking in coping and social skills, and have difficulty with intimacy and relationships. They are often unconsciously drawn to partners with similar characteristics as their parents and then re-enact the abuse over and over. They experience a constant state of internal deprivation with deep feelings of loss, isolation and emptiness. It is no wonder that so many victims of abuse turn to drugs and alcohol to feel better.




When you don't feel good about yourself there's no motivation to do what's healthy for your body and mind. It seems inevitable they would reach for relief and artificial stimulation through drugs, alcohol, sugar, caffeine, cigarettes, etc. With so many issues working against them, survivors of abuse literally don't feel capable of functioning in the world. Alcohol and drugs are used as a coping mechanism. It gives them courage when they're afraid; company when they are lonely; a false sense of control and power, which was taken away from them in childhood; it reduces the dysphoria; and anaesthetises the emotional pain. It is also used to keep memories of the abuse from surfacing. When you don't feel loved, nurtured, connected and worthwhile, this too has a very powerful negative impact on neurotransmitters.






Being nurtured is a necessary component to thrive and provides healthy stimulation to neurotransmitters. So although these particular effects of child abuse that we're speaking of at the moment are emotional and spiritual, they are deeply interconnected with the physiological and perpetuate the vicious cycle of damage to brain chemistry. Additionally, when the survivor of abuse becomes involved in the use and abuse of drugs and alcohol, they usually engage in behaviours that violate their morals and values. This results in deeper feelings of shame, guilt and confusion, which drives them even further into alcohol and drug use to cover up these feelings.

Related articles

• The Child Within having been traumatised develop a variety of self-defeating beliefs about themselves and the world.
• Patterns of Low Self-Esteem in Relationship Dependents:
• We who are the addicted survivors of abuse
• The Stages Study Course means us having the courage to peel back layers of pain and sadness.
• Just by making contact with the child within and that their is an attempt to make an empathetic listening environment that starts the process of building a new recovered self
• We do not erode our self-esteem over big issues but over small ones